Friday, July 30, 2010

With the Dentist

I just came back from the dentist to fix this one cracked tooth and also crowning, after a long break from any kind of heavy dental procedures. I forgot how terrible the experience can be, and realized how much faith I exercised in the room.

There was nothing that I could see except the ceiling - not even the dentist's face. I could only hear his voice when he said, relax and breath normally, or when he reminded me, if it's too painful then lift up your left hand but don't move, but that's all there is to it: listen.

The dentist's voice is softer compared to all the other tools that are making hair-standing noises like those of the drill, enhancing my fear and distracting me from hearing the dentist's voice. I have to listen closely, but most of the times I just have to sit still and trust that he will get the job done. There is a mixture of fear, anxiety, uncertainty, loss of control, but there's also trust (that he knows what he is doing) and hope (that the ordeal shall pass soon).

I thought, hmmm, this sounds very much alike my spiritual faith. I need to sit still, trust, hope, and keep listening.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

God Is Lonely

I have often heard the argument that God, in His existence being Trinity, has all the love to share amongst them all. God is satisfied with Himself, He is who He is.

Let me throw you an unanswerable question: what if God can be lonely? What if, in being a human, He has limited Himself to the things that He can access. What if Jesus was lonely, when He way praying and His disciples were sleeping in the Garden of Gethsemane?

What if, each day as God waits for us to spend time with Him, and as we continually forget about Him, what if, God is lonely - lonely without us?

(Post is inspired by a song in my IPod by Alanis Morisette - What If God Is One of Us?)

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Truth Doesn't Make Us Free

I was reading a book, If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!, and was challenged by one phrase, "the Truth does not make people free" (Kopp, 1976, p. 13). I had to put down the book, sit down and reflect. Is this book misleading?

There was a tension inside my heart because I am utterly convinced of what the Bible states. I know the Bible states that the Truth will set us free (John 8:32).

After sitting down with that tension and allowing it to seep through, I realize that Kopp was right. But the Bible is also true. I have come to a conclusion that even though the Truth will set us free, It definitely does not make us free. If the Truth makes us free, God's proclamation about human freewill becomes questionable.

The word "will" in the Bible is the important key that we often overlook. We forget the divine requirement of our very own participation in every change, improvement, and encounter with God.

The Truth can make us free as much as we want ourselves to be freed. If we want to stay in bondage, the Truth does not make us free, even though It will and It can. The Truth cannot change our attitudes unless we want to; the Truth can be everything but is not going to unless we want It to be.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Marrying a Psychologist

DISCLAIMER: This thought is based on my own experiences and has nothing to do with empirically-supported research or findings in the field. Thus, this is a conclusion or an opinion solely coming from me and no one else. This does not represent any other individual or organization in the field. The use of "he" instead of "she" is a conscious decision, rather than due to ignorance or gender bias, because I am writing as a She.

Marrying a psychologist may not be a bad idea.

1. He will generally be more empathic, or rather, have the capacity or conscious ability to be and to act such.
2. He will be capable of listening with all due critical analysis to the hidden meanings behind every sentence, thus more sensitive to hints and nudges.
3. He will be more understanding towards little quirks.
4. He will be more intentional in attempting to fix bad habits of both parties.
5. He will take more initiative to find a solution if there were to be any miscommunication or misunderstanding.
6. He will be more forgiving because he has been trained to contain others' chaos.
7. He is able to look beyond the flaws and believes in the strengths of his wife, motivating and encouraging her to reach her maximum potential.
8. He will be more adept in being direct or subtle, depending on the situation.
9. He knows the best way to care for and love his wife.
10. He is a psychologist at heart.

Or marrying a psychologist may be a nightmare.

1. He will be tired when he gets home after work so he does not want to be intentionally empathic, instead taking advantage of his wife as a dumping bin.
2. He will be less attuned to his wife's words because he has used up all his energy at work and now wishes to be listened or heard instead.
3. He will be less patient because he is not paid to be a psychologist at home.
4. He will be more than qualified to over-analyze every sentence, ensuring that every unintentional hidden meanings are expressed.
5. He will be more sensitive to every bad habit his wife and has the ability to point out every mistake committed.
6. He may expect her to listen to him as to how to fix it because he believes that he is an expert.
7. He is capable of diagnosing his wife with anything from the DMS-IV, including a couple personality disorders.
8. Since he can conceptualize different interpersonal problems, he may unintentionally manipulate the situation according to his wishes.
9. He knows the best way to trick or annoy his wife.
10 He is a psychologist at heart.

思念

思念能变成一种很残酷的敌人
因为惦记着的都是所有的美丽
这种怀念一想起来就鼻酸
因为有失去捡不回来的觉悟
而心里的挂念很难释放
但如果让它当人生其中的一个故事
也许心里的负担也可以慢慢减轻
不会拖累了这充满期待的心
为这生命的过程添上酸甜苦辣的快乐
让经验教导一个很重要的基点:
这人生最终还是该潇洒走一回

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Psalm 23

I was having many thoughts regarding the present and the future. Unfortunately, at the same time, making comparisons between people.

I thought, how is it that some people are able to get there without putting in so much effort? How is it that some people are in better positions without doing anything challenging or difficult, or at least noticeably so. How is it that people are able to live such good lives without worries, just because they have access to everything that they need?

Then Psalm 23 came in a form of night devotion. God will provide for all things, I shall not want. I shall not want what others have, or where others are. I shall only want God and His presence in my life.

We are running different races ultimately, and there is no such thing as who is faster or slower in this race, for everyone has been entered in a different race. My race happens to be harder than others, while easier than most, if I were to sit down, think, and be gut-wrenching honest with myself.

My race is a race that only I can run and complete. How I will finish is determined by how faithful I am during.